Quotes:Hades

Oh no! The water! I'm in big trouble if I don't fetch it!
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• Hades
• Gameplay
• Gallery
• TCG
• Quotes

This page contains a list of quotes said by Hades during the course of Kingdom Hearts, Kingdom Hearts Chain of Memories, Kingdom Hearts Re:Chain of Memories, Kingdom Hearts II, Kingdom Hearts Birth by Sleep, Kingdom Hearts Re:coded, Kingdom Hearts III, and Kingdom Hearts Dark Road.

Cutscene Quotes

Kingdom Hearts Dark Road

• "Welcome to the games!"
  — before appearing to Xehanort and his classmates.
• "Name's Hades, Lord of the Dead, aka Lord of the Underworld—a place you all are apparently dying to see. So, I'm here to offer you a deal."
  — to Xehanort and his classmates.
• "Win the tournament, and I'll send you a personal invitation to my domain."
  — explaining the deal to Xehanort and his classmates.
• "Eh. Eh. Not so fast. A tournament has to have rules. Rule 17: Three people to a team."
  — explaining a tournament rule.
• "All right then. Let the games begin! Hey, and...uh, put on a good show, will ya?"
  — starting the tournament.
• "Hey, am I missing the party?"
  — after the tournament.
• "About that...I changed my mind."
  — about sending the Keyblade wielders to the Underworld.
• "You're all invited."
  — before sending the Keyblade wielders to the Underworld.
• "Uh, where you wanted to be. Welcome to the Underworld!"
  — to Xehanort, Eraqus, and the third party member after bringing them to the Underworld.
• "Oh, I'm sure they're around. Somewhere. People usually fight tooth and nail NOT to end up here, but not you guys. What's the catch?"
  — to the trio of Keyblade wielders.
• ""Disappeared"? Ohhh, right. Mortals—always have to sugarcoat everything. Well, personally, I prefer "dead." "
  — to Xehanort about talking to someone who "disappeared."
• "Could be entertaining...So when and where did she kick the proverbial bucket?"
  — about letting the trio see Hoder.
• "Exactly. You die, you end up in the Underworld. Wait, are you telling me that's not what happened to your friend?"
  — about Hoder.
• "Hold on—what did you think this place was? A cosmic lost and found!? Get outta here. I've got better ways to waste my time."
  — to the trio.
• "Yes, and I brought you here. Those were the deal terms."
  — about the deal he made.
• "Fine. You caught me on a slow day. I'll dig around, see what I can do. But no promises."
  — about finding Hoder.
• "However...If I find your friend, one of you has to stay behind."
  — explaining his deal to the trio.
• "Nothing's free in life or death, kid. But don't worry, whoever sticks around is gonna have a great time being a pawn in my next scheme."
  — to the trio.
• "Sounds like a personal problem. Now, one of you stays or you all do. Take time to think about it—you've got plenty. Okay, who's your friend?"
  — to the trio.
• "Got it. Hold that thought..."
  — before looking for Hoder.
• "Found her. Came in with a few stragglers. Consider it a bonus. Follow that path. Oh, and pace yourselves. It's gonna take a while to get there."
  — after finding Hoder.
• "I wonder... How many pawns are about to join my collection?"
  — after the trio leaves.
• "Somebody talking about me...Oh, it's you. "
  — to the trio after Xehanort and Eraqus find the upperclassmen.
• "Do I look like a babysitter? Or a directory!? That said, I do know where one of them is. Here, as a new permanent resident of the Underworld."
  — about Bragi and Baldr.
• "Pfft. Like I can tell who's who."
  — about Bragi and Baldr.
• "Anyway, why are you still here? A deal's a deal. You got what you wanted. Now scram!"
  — to the trio.
• "Right... But hey, you knew the terms. One lives here now. Permanently. And I can always make room for the other one."
  — about Bragi and Baldr.
• "Or I can make room for ALL of you!"
  — before his battle.
• "Haven't you been listening to a word I said!? Ya know what, forget it. That's TWO permanent residents of the Underworld!"
  — to the trio after another classmate intervenes.
• "Sheesh. Someone likes a stacked deck."
  — after the fourth classmate joins the others.
• "You little—! You know what? It doesn't matter. I hope you all enjoy eternity here!"
  — to the classmates.
• "All that angst and for what?"
  — after the classmates get sucked into a portal.
• "You..."
  — seeing someone in the Underworld.

Kingdom Hearts Birth by Sleep

Terra's Story

• "Geez Louise, one chump after another. It's like a who's who of decathlon disasters around here. All I need is one measly warrior tough enough to give Zeus a jolt of his own medicine! Wait... Dark, moody, powerful. Yes! He's perfect."
  — walking into the vestibule.
• "How sad is this?"
  — trying to get Terra's attention.
• "Pains me to see it. All that power going to waste."
  — trying to get Terra's attention.
• "Name is Hades, Lord of the Dead, god of the Underworld, yadda yadda, how ya doin'? Hey, lemme guess, you're trying to put the kibosh on the darkness inside you. Am I right? Of course I'm right. Well, anyway, bad idea."
  — introducing himself to Terra.
• "Okay, stay with me here—darkness is inside...everybody. Nothing to be ashamed of. You play nice with it, and darkness will be your best friend. But if you go and get all self-conscious and refuse to face it, the darkness will run over you like a debutante at a toga sale. And then where are you? Nowhere. Now me, I look at you and I see potential. That's right, kid. You got the potential to conquer the darkness inside you. And I'll even give you some pointers. I mean, believe me, if anybody knows conquering, I know conquering."
  — talking to Terra about the darkness.
• "Easy. You sign up for the Games. I know, I know. "Please, Lord Hades, the Games?" But hey, you would be surprised what you can learn in the heat of battle. And don't worry. I'll be right there to guide you every step of the way. I'm kinda what you'd call an expert in the art of darkness. Oh, decide fast. This is a limited-time offer."
  — talking about conquering Terra's darkness.
• "Time to close this deal."
  — before Terra takes the deal.
• "Hold your chariot horses. You would not believe the bureaucracy involved with these things. Name?"
  — asking Terra's name.
• "Kinda earthy, but all right. Now...height and weight...What's this? "Favorite god"? Pfft, come on. "Hades." There, ba-boom. Easy peasy. I sense that you're already starting to get all warm and fuzzy with that darkness inside you. It's sweet, really. And hey, by the time you win the final match here...you'll have figured out how to conquer it for good. And don't worry, anything goes wrong, I'll make it all go away. Service with a smile."
  — while and after writing down Terra's information.
• "Okay...this is not what I had in mind. But hey, I can improvise. Time for plan beta..."
  — before Zack appears.
• "Hello, plan beta. Hey, kid! Over here, c'mere."
  — talking to Zack.
• "Huh? So, what do ya think? You like my new super-warrior? See—right here, this—it's the power of darkness. Coulda been yours. Still could, if you open up to it."
  — during Terra and Zack's fight.
• "Forget it. It looks like I bet on the wrong dark horse. That kid doesn't have what it takes to handle darkness."
  — after Terra defeats Zack.

Aqua's Story

• "Really—it's you? Here I thought I'd drop in to see which muscle-head was up next, and... Holy hydras! It's just a little girl, a little lassie, a little bluebird."
  — upon seeing Aqua beating Zack.
• "I'm sorry, is that a mosquito? Where did I put that bug spray?"
  — insulting Zack.
• "So I take it you're acquainted with the spineless chickenheart."
  — talking to Aqua about Terra.
• "Funny, ya know, 'cause I heard different. Ya see, it was Chickenheart who asked me for a little, shall we say...instruction on how to use darkness in the first place. (...) And he was so close to doing it, too, when the sap went and got cold feet. Now if that ain't cowardly, I don't know what is. But you, my little bluebird... Why not flit over here and demonstrate some real courage for the winning team?"
  — talking to Aqua about Terra.
• "Well, that was rude. A "No thank you, your godliness" might've sufficed. Fortunately, I still get to—ahem—destroy you. Rules say you face me next. And I have a whole lot of darkness...with your name on it!"
  — before disappearing.
• "I never said one-on-one."
  — after the Ice Colossus appears.
• ""Rule No. 2: Combatants may call for backup." Maybe you better call yours, bluebird."
  — before Aqua battles him and Ice Colossus.
• "I knew that snow cone wouldn't cut it. I need a real Titan. Stay tuned."
  — after Aqua defeats both him and Ice Colossus.

Kingdom Hearts

• "That little squirt took down that Heartless! Who'd have thought it?"
  — about Sora defeating the Guard Armor.
• "Rather a stubborn old goat, wouldn't you say?"
  — talking to Sora and company about Phil.
• "Whoa, hold on there, fuzz boy. Wait, let me guess. You want to enter the games, right?"
  — to Sora and company about Sora's desire to enter the Games.
• "Well, then, hey, get a load of this."
  — talking to Sora, giving him a ticket to enter the Games.
• "It's all yours. Good luck, kid. I'm pulling for you, little shorty."
  — talking to Sora about pulling for him in the Games.
• "That little punk is your next opponent, okay? Now, don't blow it. Just take him out."
  — talking to Cloud about taking out Sora.
• "I know! You think I don't know? I wrote the contract! I know it says you're only required to kill Hercules in this tournament. But you've gotta fight that kid to get to him. Come on."
  — talking to Cloud about the latter's contract and fighting Sora.
• "Hey, it's like that old goat says: Rule 11: It's all just a game, so let loose and have fun with it!"
  — talking to Cloud about the Games.
• "I mean, a casualty or two along the way is no big deal, right?"
  — talking to Cloud about defeating Sora.
• "Geez. Stiffer than the stiffs back home. Still, suckers like him are hard to come by..."
  — talking about Cloud.
• "Oh, right, there was one rule I forgot: Accidents happen."
  — about sending Cerberus into the Coliseum.
• "He's strong, he's kind. He's always there for you, and he's handsome to boot. He's perfect. Perfect. Perfectly infuriating! He makes me crazy."
  — talking about Hercules.
• "Wait a minute. What are you worried about? All the pieces are in place. Relax. Here's what you do. Let Hercules train the kid. In the next games, I'll take care of them both."
  — talking about Sora.
• "Who invited you to the party? Stay out of this. This is my show."
  — talking to Maleficent.
• "That smarmy vizier could've had 'em—if someone had stuck around to give him a hand."
  — talking about Jafar.
• "Whoa, whoa, whoa. Lighten up. I'm as cool as they come, okay? By the way, kid, have we got something special for you."
  — talking to Riku.
• "Yo, hey, how're you doin' everybody yeah. Got a minute? Hades, Lord of the Dead. Nice to see you. Hey guess what? I got a place for you down under!"
  — before battling in the Hades cup.
• "Oh! Hey, kid, wh-what are you doing? Stop! Hey, guys! G-get away from me! Come on! Come on!"
  — being attacked by unknown individuals after being defeated.

Kingdom Hearts Chain of Memories

• "Whoa-whoa-whoa, wait just a MINUTE! What is THIS? "Hercules is a model of true strength and gallantry - the perfect hero"?! Oh, he's perfect, all right. PERFECTLY INFURIATING! Just thinking about that little sunspot makes me boil! Grraah! I'd like to send him to the Underworld...permanently!"
  — talking about Hercules to Cloud.
• "Now, now, Cloud, we don't want to spill the beans."
  — talking to Cloud.
• " Looks like you oversold yourself, Cloud. All you did was wear him down. This doesn't look good for your performance rating... Let me put it this way: You, my spiky-haired friend, are fired."
  — "firing" Cloud.
• "I said, you're through! This time I'll take care of Irk-ules myself!"
  — pushing everyone away from him.
• "Cloud may have failed to take you out, but he did break you down. Time for Plan B. Pack your pita, Herc, 'cause you've just won a free trip to the Underworld — paid by me!"
  — talking to Hercules.
• "Rule #6! There are no rules! Ha ha!"
  — before battling Sora.

Kingdom Hearts Re:Chain of Memories

• ""Hercules is a model of true strength and gallantry—the perfect hero"?! Oh, he's perfect, all right. PERFECTLY INFURIATING!"
  — talking about Hercules
• "Just thinking about that little sunspot makes me boil! HOO, I'd like to drag him to the Underworld!"
  — getting mad because of Hercules
• "That's right. You're my man... Cloud, is it? Your job is to beat Hercules in the games. And once you've got him cornered......finish the job. Do that for me, and—"
  — to Cloud about their "deal."
• "You have my word."
  — to Cloud.
• "Now, now, Cloud, we don't want to spill the beans."
  — when Cloud talks about getting his memories back.
• "Looks like you oversold yourself. All you did was wear him down. This doesn't look good for your performance rating...Let me put it this way: You, my spiky-haired friend, are fired. "
  — to Cloud.
• "Did you really think you could get back your memories just like that? Get a grip!"
  — to Cloud.
• "Out of the way! I'll take care of Irk-ules myself!"
  — to Cloud.
• "Rule #5! It's never too late to enter the games."
  — after unleashing an attack.
• "Cloud may have failed to take you out, but he did break you down. Time for Plan B. Pack your pita, Herc, 'cause you've just won a free trip to the Underworld—paid by me!"
  — to Hercules.
• "Good point, kid. I guess you'll just have to go with him! Rule #6! There are no rules! Ha ha!"
  — before his battle.

Kingdom Hearts II

• "Where do they dig these freaks up? Geez, Louise."
  — talking to Pete.
• "Just the Underworld's deepest dungeon. This time I'm bringing out the mother of all bad guys."
  — before bringing back Auron.
• "Let's cut to the chase. Here's the deal I'm gonna offer you. I let you out of the slammer-no strings-you'll be free as a bird. And all for one little job. Fight Hercules, in the Coliseum...to the death!"
  — offering a deal to Auron.
• "Did you forget who you're talking to? I am the Lord of the Dead!"
  — talking to Auron.
• "YOU ARE FIRED!!!"
  — before attempting to kill Auron after he insults [him].
• "That's right! See, that's the thing. In the Underworld, heroes are zeroes---comes with the territory."
  — after Sora and company tries to fight him.
• "Leaving so soon?"
  — before Sora and company tries to leave his chambers.
• "This is MY Underworld, you idiot! I'll handle this MYSELF! (snaps fingers) Cerberus, go!"
  — before Sora and company fights Cerberus.
• "Let me see if I got this right... That brat's Keyblade works on any lock?"
  — talking to Pete about Sora's keyblade.
• "Have I ever told you about about the killer coliseum we have right here in the Underworld? It makes the one upstairs look like an Olympic kiddie pool."
  — mentioning the Underdrome to Pete.
• "Problem: Zeus locked it tight."
  — when Pete suggests to use the Underdrome to destroy Hercules.
• "Bingo... All we gotta do is swipe that key...and then reopen the Underdrome!"
  — talking about reopening the Underdrome.
• "I think this calls for a woman's touch."
  — planning to use Meg.
• "...went and got herself lost in the Underworld."
  — talking about Megara to Hercules.
• "You've got a very important match today, against, um... the bloodthirsty Hydra! I mean, if you don't stick around, who knows what kind of "accidents" might happen."
  — talking about Hercules match against the Hydra.
• "Now that's what I call a key. Gee, thanks for your help! Now have a nice day."
  — after Sora unlocks the Underdrome and fights Pete.
• "Could today possibly get any better? This time Wonder-breath is going down for good."
  — after the chamber starts collapsing.
• "Yeah, yeah, Styx and stones. Hey, maybe you should go check on that Hydra you neglected to finish off. I hear things are really FALLING APART up there, champ."
  — talking to Hercules about the Coliseum.
• "Hate to run, but I've got another little diversion to attend to."
  — before retreating to prepare the next tournament.
• "The Underdrome's back, and you are gonna fill the stands. After all, your fans won't settle for anything less than a certified hero."
  — talking about the Underdrome.
• "Excuse me? Hey, I'm not a selfish guy. I'm not like those high and mighty snobs up on Olympus. I stand for the masses! And have I got a massive idea! The games, ladies and gentlemen...are back! Yours truly, Hades---the one and only Lord of the Dead---brings you the ultimate games, to celebrate the re-opening of the ultimate coliseum! We'll finally answer the age-old question: Who deserves the title "Ultimate Hero"? These games are gonna settle the debate once and for all! The winner reigns supreme. Of what? You guessed it! The Hades Cup! And I assure you that the "Great" Hercules will be there. Otherwise..."
  — talking about the Hades Cup to Sora and company.
• "...You'll never see your girlfriend again."
• "Heh. You're too kind, kid."
• "Okay, so you made one lousy mistake: you exist. But hey, I'm a forgiving guy. You keep your end of our little deal, and I'm willing to overlook a transgression or two."
  — talking to Auron.
• "Now that is entertainment!"
  — while Auron and Hercules fights.
• "Why those little—Ugh, prisoner! What happened to our mutual agreement? I can give you a clean slate, but you gotta work with me."
  — after realizing he lost control over Auron.
• "That's it! This game is over. I've played by the rules so far. Okay, I confess! I was hoping Wonderboy would lose, but it was still a fair fight. C'mon, is that really so wrong? Huh?"
  — admitting his deceitful tactics to Sora and company.
• "Laugh, laugh, laugh all you want! (laughs weakly) Because the laughing is about to stop. Wanna know why? Because now we're gonna play by my rules."
  — before suspending Megara in a puff of smoke.
• "Oh, yeah. This is gonna be good."
  — before Sora and company fights him while invincible.
• "What is so funny, you imbeciles! How dare you get a happy ending! How DARE you!"
  — before fighting Sora and company as well as Hercules.
• "It's...not over...yet..."
  — after being defeated and tripping into the swirling vortex.

Kingdom Hearts Re:coded

• "Hmph. I guess they'll let anyone in here. Hate to burst your baklava, kid, but you picked the wrong labyrinth to get lost in. If some hero-shmero can't find his way out, where's that put you? Now, back to stuff I care about... Hercules! This time I'm kicking his heroic hiney straight into the Underworld! But, ahem, first, I think I'll watch the pipsqueak squirm a bit. Oh, I'm going to enjoy this..."
  — talking about Data-Sora.
• "Hmph, pretty tough, for a half-pint. Just who is this keyboy, anyway? Him teaming up with Herc the Jerk could put a kink in things... Wait, wait, I've got it! If I can just teach that other lost puppy a few new tricks... Oh, Hades, you are on fire."
  — talking about Data-Sora.
• "Heh heh... Buy a clue, losers. As if fighting me will make the big, bad labyrinth go away. Okay, you're on deck. Go put those chumps out of my misery."
  — talking to Cloud.
• "Exactamundo, Spike. And this is your big chance to see what makes a hero tick. That's what you're after, right?"
  — talking to Cloud.
• "Look, I know, I get it. In the past, you've always come up short when it counted. But with a true hero's strength—still with me? Well, buddy boy, let's just say you'll never come up short again. Now go, and show Hercules who can really go the distance."
  — talking to Cloud.
• "Geez Louise... This one's a real charmer."
  — after Cloud leaves.
• "Please. This stopped being about you, like, ages ago...okay? Oh, sure, you COULD have been useful. I mean, hello? I don't lie to chumps like you unless I'm gonna get good mileage. All you had to do...was distract Irk-ules long enough for me to mangle his moussaka. But nooo!"
  — talking to Cloud about lying to him.
• "Oh, I see, pick on the guy with ambitions to rule the world. Bzzt, wrong!"
  — to Data-Sora.
• "Sorry, Wonder Boy, but I'm not the only pine cone in your pita. This maze has another keeper. But hey, I'm a fair sort of god. I'll stay out of your way. Why work when I can just sit back, relax, and watch you all wither away to dust?"
  — to Hercules.
• "So long, Spike. Go find a bucket and kick it."
  — before leaving.
• "Ugh, I should have known he was a pinhead from the haircut. All that talk about hunting down heroes got my hopes up, but seriously, that was pathetic with a capital P.U.! Well, at least he wore that pair of pests down. And once they see who's guarding the way outta here... Heh heh. That oughta wipe the smirk...off of Herc."
  — to himself.
• "Uh, 'scuse me, aren't you forgetting a few loose ends? Yeah, hi, I'm right here."
  — after Cerberus is defeated.
• "I finally find a trap with all the right trappings, and what do you do? You go and ruin it. Okay, the thing about deadly mazes? You're supposed to DIE in them. But I see this is going to take a more hands-on approach!"
  — before fighting Data-Sora, Hercules, and Cloud.
• "Rrgh! Don't think you've won yet! I've got over 500,000,000 lives! Sure, most of them are ones I took... But I will be back!"
  — choosing to retreat for the time being.

Kingdom Hearts III

• "All right. I know I dotted my I's, crossed my T's, zeroed the hero. So what gives? Who could possibly be trying to give me a migraine by yodeling that yutz's name?"
  — when Sora yells for Hercules.
• "Oh, it's just you. Oy vey."
  — noticing Sora and company.
• "Don't forget...I can always turn up the heat!"
  — responding to Sora's taunts.
• "What is everyone's infatuation with that dolt?! You know what? Never mind. Never mind. I'm cool. I'm good. Because...Wonderboy'll be outta my hair soon enough."
  — after Goofy irritates him by saying Hercules's name.
• "Whoa, easy—what is this, Sparta? Kind of on a schedule. Don't have time to toss around the old fire and brimstone. The whole cosmos is basically waiting for me to, you know, conquer it!"
  — when Sora challenges him.
• "Where are my Titans? Show me your power!"
  — summoning the Titans.
• "Ahh! Love the breeze."
  — when the Titans unleash their power.
• "Ahh. That sent 'em sailing. Sailing right to where I left... Eh, no biggie. Nice work, boys! So, back to the whole cosmic coup thing?"
  — after the Titans blow Sora and company away.
• "Ugh. Really? Are you kidding? Geez Louise. Seriously, when it rains, it pours. Okay, who's the new pest?"
  — noticing Maleficent and Pete's Corridor of Darkness.
• "Oh, perfect. Now I gotta put up with you two. Funny, I don't remember you doing me any memorable favors. So, you can keep your Heartless this time. I'm going back to my original plan. All right? So...toodle-oo! Exit's thataway. Hey, it was great seein' ya! Happy traaails!"
  — encountering Maleficent and Pete.
• "Black box, huh? Hmm... Black box, black box, black box... Wait. Don't tell me... You're after the one Zeus hid on earth?"
  — believing Maleficent is after Pandora's Box.
• "No, I'm the one giving orders now, bolt boy."
  — imprisoning Zeus.
• "Get them!"
  — ordering the Titans to attack Sora and company.
• "I can't believe it! I put eighteen years into that plan and you've blippin' ruined it! I really don't like you."
  — after Hercules throws the Titans away.
• "Enough already! I did not come this far to be ridiculed by Zeusy high and mighty, his little sunspot, and a trio of clowns! You know what? I'll just go ahead and destroy you!"
  — upon being mocked by Sora and company.
• "You'll pay for this! I have a very, very long memory! I can still dunk your little Nut-Meg in a river of de—"
  — before Zeus seals him away.

Battle Quotes

Kingdom Hearts Birth by Sleep

Aqua's Story

• "All yours, frosty."
  — at the start of battle.
• "Bada-boom!"
  — before starting firewheel.
• "Here comes the heat!"
  — when using fireball attack.
• "I'm on fire!"
  — before starting firewheel.
• "That's it, you're done!"
  — when using fire slap attack.
• "I don't believe this!"
  — upon defeat.

Kingdom Hearts

• "Take that!"
  — during meteor throw and flame stream attack.
• "That's it!"
  — during meteor throw attack.
• "Feel the heat..."
  — before flame spin attack.
• "Hey, starting to get warmed up here..."
  — when reverting back to normal.
• "That all you've got?"
  — when reverting back to normal.
• "Hey, having fun yet?"
  — after flame spin attack.
• "This...isn't...happening!"
  — upon defeat.

Kingdom Hearts II

• "That's it!"
  — when entering battle and when he's about to go in berserk mode.
• "Is that all you've got?"
  — teleporting.
• "Take that!"
  — when using fire techniques.
• "I'm on fire!"
  — when using fire swipes.
• "Feel the heat!"
  — when using fireballs.
• "Want some more?"
  — using a fire rain attack.
• "Was that supposed to HURT?"
  — when Sora tries to attack him in powered-up mode.
• "This...isn't...happening!"
  — upon defeat.

Kingdom Hearts Re:coded

• "Take that!"
  — throwing firaga balls.
• "That's it!"
  — creating firewall.
• "I'm on fire!"
  — summoning three Shadow Heartless.
• "Feel the heat!"
  — creating flamethrower.
• "This... isn't... happening!"
  — when defeated.